
I am bewildered at the moment. I stood in my backyard looking up at the starry sky wondering.......just wondering as I was having to water my 2 acre yard by hand. It made me think about the days before sprinkler systems, before cell phones, before automated anything, before cable, before instant message, before tevo, before health reform, before swine flu and before the formation of the world. I stood there with my super powered nozzle on my hose wondering if all this chaos is what God had in mind. The chaos in the world has suddenly become like background noise. Hard to focus on just one item and straining to pick out the tune and words of life's song. What is my life's song? What is your life song? Is it a joyful noise to the Lord or is it a clashing cymbal? 2Cor. 10:3 "For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does". Whoa. It does and can feel like a war zone out there sometimes. Even so I know my God is with me walking with me through every turn.
I hear sirens in the night, I strain to sleep and my head has little time to rest. Is that what God intended for me? I don't think so. What I love is when I am in my element being creative, out of the norm of real life (on vacation) and when I am alone. I feel like I can focus more on Him when I shut out the rest. Not cut off, just tune it out for a bit. I know enough to get by and that is enough. Real life seems to be noisy to me adding pressures and circumstances that distract away from a life God intends. The circumstances can be brash and subtle, cunning and unkind. I don't focus on it too much and try to live in my element most of the time not watching the news that often, or reading the papers and only the headlines on my homepage or the occasional smut tv on Inside Edition. How pitiful is that? To be honest..... I like it this way. I stay in my world and cocoon and let God take care of the rest. Maybe that is the wrong way to live, apathetic to some, hermit to others and uninformed to those intellectuals that criticize my uninformed life. Ask anyone....I am usually the last to find out about everything. I am trying not to allow what others are doing, wearing, saying or prescribing as the next best thing to inject me with temptation. I am trying to conserve, not only water, but my thinking, unclouding my thoughts, and discarding the wasteful energy it takes to decipher through the muttle. I don't like to participate in gossip, so don't know the latest scoop. I get few requests for lunch dates, no phone calls from friends just to chat or invitations to do anything, fund raisers not included. And you know what? I think I am ok with it. I used to let it hurt my feelings, but am becoming more and more comfortable being my own person. What in the world is wrong with this picture? I thought it would be a little different, but different is becoming not such a bad thing. Do I really want all that other in my life? Is there anything wrong with my picture looking the way God painted it? My picture is exactly the way God intended for it to look. My picture totally depends on the brush strokes He places on my life canvas. The colors He chooses compare to no color described here on earth. The relationships He forms to cross my path are divinely placed at just the right time for me to smash into them. Help me Lord to see this picture in front of me as You unfold each page of discovery.
O the drought may be here in Texas, but God's river of living water continues to flow even in the desert places, in the bewilderment, and in the chaos. A little sip of His replenishing water can go a long way with God. I will branch out when He nudges me too, I will carry on my daily doings to bless my family, others and Him. In our different seasons we prune, we hibernate and we grow. I must say the social media has given me a boost and another branch upon which to blossom His fruit for others to pick and be nurtured as it also feeds me. Mark 16:15 says," Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation". I faithfully and eagerly remain His to use and work through in this world of what's. This world is not my home. A poster was taped on the inside of my pantry for ten years. When we moved it got all messed up and torn, but here is what it said. "This world is not my home though it appears to be. My home is with my God, who's waiting there for me. the time is coming very soon, the signs are very clear. So when the trumpet sounds, I'll be outta here!" Hallelujah!
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